My Heart, His Armor
by Ridley C. James
Summary: Tag for Episode 2:15. Murdoc lays out his demands to see his son. Jack reacts in typical Jack fashion. Hurt comfort and angst ensues.


My Heart, His Armor

By: Ridley

A/N: So I did not mean to do another tag. I blame this one on my beta, Mary, who said there was too much of an opportunity for hurt comfort to pass up. I was also inspired as I often am by the show when they write Jack in a way which I truly believe is out of character. I don't think he would be scheming romantic plots while their lives were in extreme jeopardy, and while I understand the need to put some levity in the scenes, I don't think Jack needs to look foolish or incompetent to do so. Sigh. So, here is my little missing scene. And there is no episode tonight, so I hope this might lessen the sting of a Friday without our favorite guys.

RcJ

Nightmares did come true.

Finding his partner down, a psychotic hit man standing over him with a gun was proof enough for Jack Dalton. Murdoc with his tales of drawn and quartered spiders and maimed pigeons was enough material for a nightmare all on his own. Throw in Mac bleeding and there was plenty to disturb and disrupt Jack's sleep for weeks to come thank you very much. Then there was the fact Jack hadn't been there. He'd once again broken his promise to not let anything happen to his best friend.

The thing that would plague Jack's psyche, torment him for an unforeseeable future would be Jack's failure to prevent Mac from being hurt, his inability to protect him, to do the one job he was there to perform. Keep. Mac. Safe. It would no doubt be displayed nightly on repeat, relived in vivid detail over and over again. And Jack deserved every bit of the torment. He was an idiot-as stupid as Murdoc believed.

"You think I'm going to give you something- _anything-_ besides a hole in your skull after you shot my partner?" Jack pointed the gun at Murdoc's head. The man had just had the nerve to announce his demands as if he had some kind of leverage, as if he were the freaking anti-hero of the story. He was seconds from drawing his last breath and yet was using it to continue his pompous, narcissistic rhetoric.

"Jack." Mac's voice was laced with pain, and the demand it held for Jack to back down was lost in the kid's breathlessness.

Jack's heart, which had been hammering in his chest from the moment he'd heard the gunshots and knew- _he just fucking knew_ -that Mac had been shot, slowed. His own breathing quieted, pulse slowing from a full-on gallop as an unnatural calm descended over him like steadying hands on his tense shoulders. It was the same as when he was perched to take a shot from a sniper's blind and for the first time in the last twenty-four hours Jack felt he had the advantage. The slight flutter of anticipation behind his ribs, the one that he knew came from some primal anticipation of the future kill, had him itching to pull the trigger. Murdoc's smirk made it so damn tempting, especially with the cloying, metalic smell of spilled blood in the air. His brother's blood.

"I saved your boy's life." Murdoc spoke proudly, a cocky grin still playing around his mouth even though he was weaponless and on his knees. "Now you, Mister Head of Security, will help me see mine."

"You _shot_ my boy, you sick sonofabitch." Jack growled, taking a step closer. Murdoc was feigning the submissive wolf rolling over to expose its belly. It was most likely purposive, to make himself appear anything but dangerous. Anger coiled in Jack's belly, only Mac's soft exhalation of his name once more on a panted breath keeping it in any kind of check. "I won't be obliging you with anything but a piece of lead."

"It was either my deliberately skillful strike that effectively took Angus out of the line of fire or a few nasty rounds from behind." Murdoc showed his arrogance by actually grinning again, attempting an imitation of Jack by reverting to a poor southern twang. "I figured a cowboy with a white hat like yourself would naturally be appalled at anyone who'd back-shoot a worthy adversary."

"What do you want?" Mac asked, obviously trying to redirect the conversation. Jack could easily see how the younger man fought to not show any pain in front of Murdoc, when he tried to struggle some semblance of an upright position.

"Has blood loss already dulled that sharp mind, Angus? I told you I want to see my son. A reunion with Casian." Murdoc glanced at Jack's downed partner, then refocused on Jack once more, his grin fading. "Look how being left wondering why one's parent has suddenly disappeared leaves a psyche plagued with doubts and insecurities. It can hobble a young boy and I think you'd understand having witnessed the effect up close. Surely you grasp the desire a father has to protect his children. I mean you have Riley and Angus…"

"Don't!" Only a few feet separated Jack and the hit man. He gave a slight shake of his head. "Don't you dare pretend that you and I have anything in common, especially when it comes to how we feel about family, Murdoc." Jack's finger tightened ever so slightly, his jaw clenched. He'd only need to apply a bit more pressure and Murdoc would be gone. Jack would still be a liar but he'd have wiped that smug, knowing smirk off the bastard's face.

No more sick, twisted head games. No more danger to Mac, at least not from his own personal arch nemesis. It might even quell some of Jack's bad dreams, end a few of Mac's. No one would question if it was necessary force. Mac had a bullet wound and anyone who knew Jack would clearly find it a righteous kill. "You see I believe I'd actually be doing your kid a hell of a favor by putting you out of your misery once and for all." Not to mention the benefit to Jack's kid.

"I could have escaped," Murdoc continued, changing tactics as if he hadn't heard Jack. The man was as shifty as a sand bar. Did he not understand? For all his studying them and seeming to have a grasp on what made their team tick, he was clueless. Maybe it was because he was incapable of feeling the one thing that drove Jack. Murdoc had no capacity for love. Any connection he had to Casian was most likely hubris. The handicap blinded him. He was unable to see that Mac was Jack's heart, that Jack was Mac's armor. Jack would destroy anyone that attempted to harm Angus MacGyver, but still the sociopath rambled on as if the reaper before him gave a shit about his good behavior. "You see I had the means-a nice patrol car right outside..."

"We both know the only reason you stayed was because it was your best chance of ending your old pal, Helman, getting him off your trail once and for all while he was outnumbered. You probably planned on taking us out as well." Jack sent a quick glance to Mac when he heard a quiet groan coming from the younger man. The blood stain on his shirt was growing, his partner looking paler.

" _You_ possibly," Murdoc admitted, a gleam in his eyes. "I almost chose you for my Christmas present to Angus you know-instead of shooting the lovely Cage. But then I reasoned why start with Check so soon in our little game of Chess. I was afraid taking you off the board would end my fun. No, I think I'll save you to last. Rest assured, Jackie Boy, when I do kill you I want to make it messy and painful so Angus suffers greatly, but a bullet is too unoriginal for MacGyver. I have other things in mind after I rob him of everyone he cares for."

"You just proved my point for me." Jack pressed out through gritted teeth. He shifted the gun, sighting Murdoc's sweet spot. Out of the corner of his eye he could see that Mac had made it to sitting position. Sweat beaded his face, and he looked like he might be sick.

"I also did your job for you." Murdoc doubled back around, his verbal below the belt assault catching Jack off guard. "It would have been so easy to have killed Angus. Especially as seeing as how he was out in the open, unprotected, absorbed in doing his MacGyver thing. " Murdoc's tone was baiting. Jack was pretty sure the man had a death wish. "You should be thanking me instead of pointing a gun at my head. I saved you having to explain to dear Matilda how aside from the fact you have 'one job' you messed it up."

"Shut up, Murdoc," Mac said with a fair bit of heat, but it was the strained quality of his voice that kept Jack in check.

"I'm only asking to see my son," Murdoc said again with gall. "Angus's Wookie Life Debt to me aside, I have been a model prisoner during this whole road trip."

"We'll be sure to fill Matty in on your good deeds, Dudley Do Wrong." Jack made a split second decision, the fact Murdoc had the nerve to twist the Star War's reference that Jack often used to describe his commitment to Mac the final straw. He swung Helman's gun around catching Murdoc across the face with enough force to knock the bastard over. Jack straddled Murdoc before he could recover, bringing the stock down to slam into the man's temple, rendering him unconscious.

"Jack!"

Jack had lifted the gun again, was about to deliver another blow to be sure their 'model prisoner' would indeed be on his best behavior yet. A flash from the past revealed Craddock's face instead of Murdoc's slack features. The memory was a lit match to gasoline. He was mid strike when Mac's strangled 'please' was like a bucket full of ice water, bringing him back to his senses."

"Shit." Jack drew up short, lowering the gun down to his side. Letting it go took effort, but thoughts of Mac bleeding and hurting brought not only much needed clarity but a resolve to get his act together. He blew out a long breath.

"Jack?" The one word sounded weak and pained.

"I know. I got it." Jack spared Mac another glance, lifting a hand when he saw his partner shakily trying to get to his knees. "Stay where you are."

Jack flipped Murdoc over, roughly stripping the man of his black jacket. "Can you get to your knife, bud?"

It took a moment but by the time Jack was on his feet, his partner had retrieved the knife Jack had given him a few weeks before. Jack dropped Murdoc's coat and took the SAK without meeting Mac's gaze. He tried to ignore the blood smeared over the Victorinox cross as he opened it to the blade and smoothly cut the ties from the tarpaulin his partner had planned to use as a trap for Helman. Kneeling once more beside Murdoc, he pulled the unconscious man's hands tightly behind him, using his knee to hold them in place as he wrapped the rope with a cold satisfaction around Murdoc's wrists before tying it off with a knot he hoped cut the bastard's circulation off.

One psycho temporarily taken care of he retrieved Murdoc's gun, checking the safety before sliding it to the back of his jeans. He grabbed Helman's gun and crossed to the other killer, keeping a visual on Mac. He felt for a pulse not surprised when nothing registered. The amount of blood pooled around the hitman was an indication of Murdoc's on point aim. With the immediate threats assessed and handled Jack made his way to Mac's side.

"I'm sorry." The words were out before Jack was even on his knee, his hands hovering over Mac's shoulder. "I'm so sorry, bud."

"Jack." Mac shook his head, blinking dazedly for a second. "It's good. I'm okay."

"I should have been here. I should have never left you alone." Jack knew he was rambling, a side effect of the adrenaline rush mixing with all the what if's that kept running like an unchecked loop. He might have laughed at Mac's overly optimistic declaration of his state of well being if he hadn't been half sick from the nauseatingly sweet smell of copper that filled the room. "I need to get your jacket off."

"Jack…" Mac tried again, as Jack fumbled with the kid's sleeve, giving it a tug to demonstrate that there was a time crunch and Jack didn't have time for this partner to try and make him feel better. Only when Mac hissed and tried to pull away from Jack's touch did he look up and meet his partner's bright blue gaze.

"I have to stop the bleeding, keep you from going into shock. We need to get you to help." Jack explained, tugging once again at Mac's sleeve. To be so incredibly smart, Mac could seem to be completely clueless when it came to his own welfare. That's where Jack was supposed to come in. But he'd let other things steal his focus, brooding over Murdoc's little snide comments, verbal potshots to his ego. Then there was Diane. He'd been going over what he was going to say like some lovesick school boy, envisioning the date he might plan for them just moments before his best friend had been gunned down by a psycho who'd already kidnapped him once, stabbed one of their family and nearly finished off their newest team member. What the hell was wrong with him? He somehow managed to meet Mac's gaze. "You're shot, kid."

"I'm aware, big guy." Mac gave a roll of his eyes, gripping Jack's wrist. "But I'm not bleeding out. It's not like Lake Como, or Cairo. Calm down."

"There's a new hole in your chest where there shouldn't be one. There's blood on the outside of your body that was on the inside moments ago when I left you to build your improvised trap. Semantics." Jack ducked his head, took a deep breath as he tried to push away his anger, along with the unwanted images that Mac's mention of Como and Cairo had brought. Flashes of Mac floating in the water after Nikki's henchman had tried to kill him taunted and teased at the edges of his memory. The kid bleeding in the sand after Craddock had gotten a shot off despite Jack's best attempts to stop him. Both huge ass beacons pointing to Jack's inadequacy. Ones he should have learned from so not to repeat the mistakes that had cost his partner.

When he looked up Mac was watching him, pain and uncertainty roiling in his gaze. Jack was pissed, but Mac wasn't the source and letting the kid think he was when his best friend was already hurting wasn't thinkable. Jack forced a half grin. "And just so you know, bud, no one in the history of the world has ever been calmed down by someone _telling_ them to calm down."

"I'll remember that." Mac said in the way he had that let Jack know he thought the older man was being completely ridiculous but was willing to humor him anyway. He winced in pain when he shifted slightly.

"See that you do." Jack gently tugged his hand free from his partner's grasp, noting the smear of red left on his wrist. His gut gave another lurch and the former Delta swallowed down bile along with a good dose of bitter regret. "Now let's get this jacket off you, brother."

"I guess I should be glad you didn't just tear it off like you did Murdoc's." Mac rolled his eyes again, a grin tugging at his mouth.

"Yeah, well, that bastard is lucky I didn't use your little red knife to skin him." Jack glanced to the trench coat in question, the urge to put an end to the man's menace just as strong as it had been when he'd first entered the area and spotted Mac on the ground. He shook himself free of the memory, concentrating on the present. "I might need it for bandages or at least use it as a blanket. It's freezing in here and we need to try and keep you warm until I get us some help."

"Riley will think of a way to find us." Mac's breath hitched as Jack slid his left arm free or his jacket. "She always does. The lojack on the cop car that Helman brought maybe…"

"Well, I don't care how our computer genius does it as long as it is sooner rather than later." Jack spread Mac's coat behind the younger man before running a hand over his partner's back. He could feel the younger man's right arm trembling, not sure how long it might support his weight . There had been no blood underneath his partner to indicate a through and through, but he still needed to check. "That bullet's still in you, kiddo, and I sure as hell don't want to be forced to try some field triage with a SAK."

"Trust me, having been down that road before, I don't want that either." Mac's eyes were closed tight, his voice rough as Jack gently eased him to the ground. Once the kid was settled on his back, Jack reached for the front of Mac's shirt so he could get an unobstructed view of the wound. Mac's right hand reached up once more and long cool fingers latched onto Jack's wrist.

"This is my fault, Jack. I shouldn't have taken the handcuffs off." Mac met his gaze. "Like you said-worst idea ever."

"We both messed up, brother." Jack nodded, forcing another half smile he in no way felt. "I should have put my foot down on this whole exchange to begin with, or maybe shot Murdoc back in the car when he was messing with us, or better yet when he was rattling your cage on our impromptu train ride."

"That's not who we are." Mac held Jack's gaze, licking his dry lips.

"Well maybe we should reconsider." Jack sighed, glancing away for a moment. "This time around it would have saved me some gray hair and spared you a lot of pain."

"It does hurt." Mac blinked, looking a bit dazed. The rare admittance brought Jack's gaze back to his best friend's pale face. It always struck Jack that when the kid was hurt it seemed to catch his partner by complete surprise. Mac ended up looking all too like an unsuspecting deer suddenly blindsided by a car only to be left broken on the side of the road-frightened and stunned with pain, still unsure of what had exactly happened.

"I bet." Jack slightly shook his head, forcing the image of a dying animal from his mind and concentrated on prodding the nasty entry wound high on his partner's left shoulder. "Anything feel broken? Collar bone?"

"No. Maybe." Mac bit back a gasp and Jack could tell he was trying to suck it up, more than likely not wanting to make Jack feel worse.

"For now let's just focus on stopping the bleeding." Jack wiped his hands on his jeans, rethinking his decision not to kill Murdoc. He glanced around, considering the jacket before he moved once more to the downed sociopath. He leaned over pulling the back of Murdoc's shirt up so he could cut it down the middle before slicing away one sleeve and pulling part of it from under the other man, leaving him mostly shirtless on the cold concrete.

"What happened to using the jacket?" Mac asked when Jack made it back to his side.

"This is better material and I told you we needed to keep you warm." Jack removed his own belt, glancing at Mac as he folded the shirt he'd borrowed, his voice taking on a hard edge. "I could give a shit if he freezes to death."

"I shouldn't have let him get in my head." Mac closed his eyes again.

"Hey," Jack pressed his hand against his best friend's forehead, waiting for the kid to focus on him once more. Mac's skin was cool to the touch and had an almost translucent tinge. Neither of which was a good sign. It took a huge effort on Jack's part to hold his panic at bay. The fact they were in the middle of nowhere with no phones and no way to contact help not aiding in the task in the least. "Keep those baby blues open, you hear me."

"I hear you, man." Mac blinked, but stayed staring at Jack. "I'm not going anywhere. I promise."

"Good." It was exactly what Jack needed to hear. He folded the shirt once more, lending Mac a sympathetic gaze, regretting the pain he was going to inflict. "This is going to hurt and you're going to wish you could be anywhere but hanging out with your buddy Jack, but I need you to stay with me. Understand?"

"Naw, nowhere else I'd rather be." Mac blinked, swallowing thickly.

"Murdoc's right about one thing," Jack ground out as he placed the bandage against the still freely bleeding wound and pressed down. Mac's body arched in response, the kid's breath coming in harsh pants now as he bit back on the scream Jack knew he wanted to let loose. "You are a terrible liar, brother." Jack quickly looped the belt, efficiently sliding it over the make-shift bandage to keep up the pressure. He hated hurting the kid, but knew keeping the blood loss down was his main objective at this point. Jack reached up when he was finished, running a hand over the kid's hair. A rueful smile played around Jack's lips, his thoughts flashing back to the last year, all the situations he came up short. "I happen to know you'd rather be hanging out just about anywhere, with anyone else."

"But we always have the best time together." Mac's mouth turned up just a bit as his breath evened out. He even managed a half decent grin.

Jack snorted. "Lately, we have had anything but, kiddo."

"I wouldn't change any of it." Mac's grin faded, his tone serious. "Like you've said before no one I'd rather die with."

Jack had reached for Murdoc's coat, but the soft words had him turning towards Mac once more. "Sometimes I really worry I am rubbing off on you."

"Nothing would change my mind about us being partners. You're the only one I want watching my back." Glassy but steady eyes met Jack's.

"Even when I suck at it?" Jack returned to gathering the coat to hide his reaction to Mac's profession. He used the jacket to cover his partner, noting the shivers that were now running through Mac's body like small waves.

"Jack…" Mac started, pulling the jacket tighter.

"Either way, I'm not about to hand in my resignation." Jack squeezed Mac's wrist cutting off the kid's rebuke. He'd just have to be more valiant in his effort. Remember his fucking priorities. Diane was a nice idea, but Jack would never put his desire to have another shot at romance before the family he already had. Knowing the woman like he did, he wasn't sure how being anything but first would sit with her. She might take second place to her daughter, but Jack wasn't sure how she'd feel now that he sort of had a kid of his own to throw into the mix. "Nothing you could do or say would ever make me turn tale and run."

"You heard what I told Murdoc? About my dad?" The question was quiet, breathy.

Jack rocked back on his heels, studying his friend. He'd been caught off guard when he'd heard Mac's admittance of why he believed his father had left. Jack had heard the story before, delivered one night when they'd both had too much to drink and were coming down off a particularly bad mission. Hearing the hurt, and worse the guilt, had made the former Delta operator want to hunt down James MacGyver himself, make him confess that his inadequacies as a father had nothing to do with his son. Instead, Jack had done what he could do to try and assure his best friend. He'd talked about his mother, how he feared he could never please her and how he'd finally stopped trying and accepted her for what she was-just another human being, with all the weakness and frailties that came along with the condition.

Mac had confessed how he'd spent weeks, months trying to get his father to show some kind of emotion, to open up about his mother. When that hadn't worked he'd done what Mac considered the unthinkable and lashed out with a torrent of words and feelings, letting lose all the fears and doubts that a ten year old kid could keep pent up.

"I don't know why you told Murdoc what you did, bud, and I won't play the hypocrite and tell you it was foolish because I was the one prattling on about Diane and Riley in the car earlier, but I don't want you giving that bastard anymore ammunition to use against you. Got it? Not one more thing he could twist into you as sure as a blade."

"Maybe I told him because I wanted to believe I had convinced myself it wasn't true." Mac's gaze was filled with a hint of hopefulness, a silent plea for Jack to agree with him. "I mean telling my worst enemy my deepest fear and insecurity would be stupid, right. I mean, I'm anything but stupid. Everyone says so." He shifted slightly, trying to make it back into a sitting position.

"Terrible at charades, but definitely not a dummy by any means." Jack smirked, realizing he was still holding the kid's wrist. He let go, moving his hand up to Mac's good shoulder to stop the fruitless attempt of sitting up. "Mac, you're always the smartest guy in the room as far as I'm considered."

Mac glanced to where Murdoc was lying, another kind of pain showing on his face. "I think he murdered his father."

"Or maybe he was just making up lies again to shake you." Jack sighed, following his partner's line of sight, knowing that the mere idea of something so heinous spun Mac's moral compass. The hit man was twisted as hell. He was Hannibal Lector with a sniper's rifle and it scared Jack more than he could admit that he could see why the madman fixated on Mac so easily-how he somehow saw Jack's partner as the flipside of the coin he'd been dealt. Like Mac lived a bizarre version of the life Murdoc clearly longed for, but also despised. Murdoc was simultaneously fascinated and repulsed. Jack would never forgive Nikki for inadvertently bringing the man into their lives, for putting Mac on his radar, whatever her motivation. When he returned his gaze to Mac, the kid was frowning as if he could read Jack's thoughts.

"He can't hurt us anymore," Mac assured quietly, blinking again, his eyes struggling to focus. "We got him this time and we're going to make sure he's put away for good, that he pays for what he's done."

"But you're still going to push for him to see Casian." Jack had known it from the moment Murdoc gave voice to his appeal. He also understood it had little to do with the fact Murdoc had saved Mac from being gunned down by Helman and more to do with the fact a young boy had been left wondering where his father had gone. It was as Murdoc so brilliantly pointed out something Mac understood all too well. Jack once more avoided the pain, both physical and emotional, which he knew would be reflected in his best friend's gaze as he pressed his fingers against Mac's throat and made a point of staring at his watch as he counted the kid's rapid pulse.

"I keep thinking Casian misses his dad." Mac swallowed thickly, his eyes closing for a moment with a low groan.

"He's not the only one." Jack rested his palm against the kid's face for a second, not liking the increased clamminess or that his partner's breathing had picked up in speed. If help didn't arrive soon he was going to have to go looking for it.

"For whatever Murdoc's done, his son doesn't deserve to suffer," Mac's proclamation was quiet, barely audible, but Jack found his own chest tightening at the hurt he could still detect. It took a few measured breaths, but Mac finally seemed to get on top of the pain and opened his eyes once more to seek out Jack's gaze. "He needs to know why his father isn't with him. No kid should be left wondering..."

"I'm going to help you find your dad, bud." Jack moved his hand to his best friend's shoulder, reluctant to withdraw his touch all together as the kid's condition seemed to be slipping. He needed to anchor both of them, to get his own racing heart back under control. "You're going to get all the answers you need to fill in the blank spots. I swear to you and if you want to do this thing with Casian, I'll go along. For you, not for Cuckoo for Cocoa Puffs over there."

Mac's soft reply of 'I know, Jack' was drowned out by the sweet sounds of blaring sirens in the distance. Jack sent up a silent thank you and vowed to treat Riley to a night of pizza at the arcade when they got back.

"Do you hear that, brother? The cavalry's on the way." For the first time since the school teacher assassin showed at Mac's door asking for the kid Jack felt the knots of tension ease.

"Never doubted it," Mac said, making a point of catching Jack's gaze before giving a hint of a faltering grin. "I knew you wouldn't let anything happen to my scrawny ass."

Jack dropped his chin to his chest, giving a half laugh at the kid's unwavering and completely unjustified confidence. Of course MacGyver would think being kidnapped, drugged, and shot didn't even warrant a black mark on Jack's body guard record. The former Delta had failed at many things, but he would not drop the ball on bringing James MacGyver back to his son. For all Jack's talk of family and the mistakes of mere mortals, he wasn't convinced the guy warranted another chance, but Mac whole-heartedly deserved whatever it took to help him move on from that staggering act of betrayal when he was ten. If that included delving into how Matty fit into the picture then so be it. Mac was the most important person in Jack's world, the epicenter, his heart, and he would stop anything or anyone-friend or foe- who threatened the kid- like any good armor was meant to do.

The End…for now


End file.
